I Saw the Governor Nekkid

Not only are the Pittsburgh Steelers the hottest thing in the sports world, but it turns out that Lynn Swann is running for Governor of Pennsylvania.

But I've met Lynn Swann in the past--and he's a genuinely nice guy. Back in the late nineties, I was living with some friends in their spare room up in North Phoenix for a couple of weeks while waiting to move into my new apartment. Anyhow, my buddy had a part-time job as the 'towel boy' at the spa at the Scottsdale Princess--one of them uppity resorts where folks like me are looked upon with disdain...

Anyhow, he was working one weekend, and I was just miserably sick with the flu. I barely had the strength to get out of bed, but my buddy (his name was Mike, also) told me to come up to the spa on Sunday night and he'd let me in to use the facilities, that maybe it would help me feel better. So I drove up there and he snuck me in.

Let me tell you, the spa facilities at the Princess are top notch, not only do they offer the usual amenities, the thing that I liked the most at that time was the Eucalyptus steam shower. They also had individual neck-deep jacuzzis, which I took full advantage of. After an hour in the jacuzzi, I made my way to the steam room.

It was around 10pm on a Sunday night when I went in there, and there was only one other patron present. I recognized him immediately as Lynn Swann. He was in town that weekend either calling an ASU game or doing something for the Cardinals and the NFL, but he was staying there at the Princess. Anyhow, I said hello and sat down on my bench enjoying the rejuvinative powers of the steam.

Before long, we started chatting about football. There I was, wearing nothing but a towel, sitting in a steam room talking about the Super Bowl with Lynn Swann (I'm a Rams fan, so I had to tell him about the daily ass-kickings I suffered in junior high because I was the only one not rooting for Pittsburgh in Super Bowl XIV) Sidebar--my buddy Eddie B was actually at the game, too.

It was a pretty cool moment, except for that part when he got up to adjust the steam and his towel fell off. Otherwise, he was very gracious and easy to talk to, and we sat in there for over a half an hour before it just got too hot to be comfortable. He headed off to the locker room, while I headed back for more eucalyptus treatment.

After that conversation, I became more of a fan of Lynn Swann and the Steelers (and it had nothing to do with the brief nudity, you sickos). So I wish him the best of luck in his political endeavors, as long as he keeps his towel cinched up.

Mikey