A Poker Story

Wow, I can't believe I forgot to post this earlier this morning when I made that first update. I guess I was pretty tired.

Anyhow, on my second-to-last table of the night, a funny thing happened.

I was sitting there, dealing an almost-full 4/8 limit game around midnight. After pushing a pot to the winner, while I was cutting the new deck and getting ready to deal a new hand, the Asian lady in seat five (directly across from the dealer's seat), sneezed.

Well, when she sneezed, she blew a big ol' booger out on the table, and it landed in front of her, directly across the yellow 'bet' line, in plain view of everyone, about midway between me and her. I didn't want to say something and embarrass her --I mean, what could I say? Hey lady, get a Kleenex and get that boog off my felt!

Instead, I chose to dummy up and deal, and did my best to just pitch the cards over the top of the mucus pile sitting between us. However, I could hear the snickers from the other players at the table while they were pointing and whispering back and forth about the fresh new obstacle in the middle of the table.

I managed to avoid pushing any chips or cards into it, and the thing sat there for about five minutes or so before the lady finally realized that 1) There was a huge booger on the table in front of her, and 2) She was responsible for it.

So what did she do?

She asked for a seat change.

Luckily there was only one seat available, and it was right next to where she was sitting. So she pushed her chips over one seat and acted like everything was all fine and dandy. A few minutes later, another player joined the game, sat down in her vacated seat, and immediately noticed it. The look on his face was priceless--you could tell he was thinking WTF is that???

Anyhow, I had a plan on how to handle it, but with just a half-hour per table, my time was running out. I deftly worked my way around it, like it was some 800-lb gorilla in the room that everyone saw but nobody would talk about, pushing pots and mucking discards without coming within three inches of the goo-pile in the middle of my layout.

Finally, on my last hand of the down, the Asian booger lady won a three-way pot. There was a huge mound of chips in the middle of the table, so what did I do? I pushed that pile right over the top and bulldozed that booger right back to her. I could hear a couple of the other players chuckle, and luckily, when she tipped me, it was two dollars from the top of her stack, not out of the pile.

I got up and headed to my next game, never seeing what happened when she stacked up her chips and realized there was that huge booger stuck to one of them. Heh. But before I sat down, I made a quick detour to the desk and lubed myself up from elbow to fingertips with the hand sanitizer.

I tell ya, working in a casino is just downright glamorous sometimes.

Mikey