Those of you that know me best know that when I'm irritated, my first reaction is to usually retaliate by going 'Over the top' and heaping my displeasure on those who've done me wrong by dogpiling my scorn and derision on them. If somebody messes with me, I usually mess with them right back, except that I 'go for the kill' and lose all sense of proportion with my reaction.
I think I was unduly influenced by Sean Connery's 'Chicago Way' speech to Kevin Costner in The Untouchables--
He pulls a knife, you pull a gun. He sends one of your guys to the hospital, you send one of his guys to the morgue...
If somebody insults me, I usually cut them to mincemeat. If somebody does me wrong, I tend to never forget it, and I've always gotten more-than-even.
At some point, I started to realize that that approach might work with the mob, but a little nuance is needed when it comes to interpersonal relationships.
The thing is, people that I would consider friends don't usually treat me badly or do me wrong. But I have an acquaintance, and everyone who knows both of us thinks we're pretty good friends, and maybe we could've been at some point, but the honest truth is, when it comes right down to it, we are not close friends. For whatever reason, I got sucked into the vortex of their fucked up life, and pretty much all advice has gone unheeded or ignored. And the weird thing is that we really don't have much in common, and their outlook on life is the antithesis of mine. I truly have no idea how I landed in this orbit.
Unfortunately, I know this person better than most, and by default, and the fact that I'm actually a nice guy on the inside, I find myself having to 'care' about what happens to them, even though I'm fairly certain they don't give two shits about what I think. Not knowing any better, the only thing I can compare it to is maybe a parent having a rebellious teenager or something, except on a *much* smaller scale. Maybe it's more like being a step-parent who is genuinely concerned for the little shit in the next bedroom--I don't know--analogies fail in this case. I'm just finding myself being concerned about someone who's not concerned about me. But then again, why would they be? Compared to them, I'm downright normal. (And no, it's not a case of unrequited love or anything sappy like that, so you armchair psychologists out there can just put a sock in it right now...)
Anyhow, the problem I'm running into is that this person seems to enjoy driving me nuts with passive/aggressive behavior, and due to proximity issues and the information age, it's almost impossible to avoid contact/gossip/the latest Did-you-hear?.
Part of me wants to just unload both barrels on this person, cut them adrift, and just move on and never think about it again--hurt feelings be damned. But the new and improved 'mature' Mikey has to just swallow it and acknowledge the fact that the world is full of inconsiderate people and this is just another one on the roster. That, and the fact knowing what I know about them, I'm sure "what Mikey thinks" doesn't even crack the top 100 when it comes to their priorities.
For me, the taking the High Road means doing nothing and hoping they fade off into obscurity before I lose my patience and then letting them know what I *really* think.
I just hope I can stay on the High Road because patience was never a strong suit with me. But I am World-Class when it comes to doing nothing.
Mikey
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