Here I am, home on a Tuesday night, ready to pound the keyboard for the next couple of hours, but I have a slight problem.
I just can't think of anything to write about. Life is rather dull right now. I worked (only six hours), had lunch, came home, watched the WSOP on ESPN, and saw Phil Helmuth act like a complete asshat again, just because he got outplayed on a hand.
I swear, if I were at that table when he started up again, I probably would've unloaded on him. Look, you got outplayed! Take it like a man and quit crying like a whiney little bitch, Sally... But that's just me. I have a short fuse when it comes to asshats.
I think I remember reading about it on the live update site back in July as it was happening, and I believe it was the last hand of the night and they gave him a ten minute penalty for the next day, but then they reversed it. I don't remember all the details, but the bottom line is that as good a poker player he is, he's just about as big a cocksucker as you'll ever meet at a poker table.
Anyhow...
I've been getting a lot of feedback from Cruise Week, and it seemed to be a big hit. Much bigger than Cole Slaw Day or the No More Kimmy episode. It was such a big hit that my little sister Amy called me earlier tonight and we discussed it further. She suggested that I do some other 'themed' weeks, but I was kind of stuck for a subject. She wanted me to do a Beer Week, but I'm not quite enough of a beer snob to pull that off. And nobody wants to spend a week reading about Michelob Light, Pacifico, and Amber Bock. That's about all I drink anymore. Well, I'll indulge in a Peroni draft while dining at Grimaldi's, and I still kinda like Newcastle, and oh yeah, I have some Sam Adams Octoberfest in my mini-fridge, but otherwise, I really don't have much to say about beer besides "It tastes good".
I suggested something that'll stir up the comments section, like a Candy Week, but while it sounds like a good idea at first blush, the execution would be troublesome. I dunno. I guess I'll wait for inspiration to strike. It could happen tonight, or it might never come at all. That's the world I live in...
While we were talking, I told Amy that the topics that get the most traffic are usually food-related, so we somehow started talking about the Luther Burger.
Behold the unhealthy goodness of the Luther Burger:
For those of you who don't know what a Luther Burger is, it's a bacon-cheeseburger, and instead of a bun, it's served on a Krispy Kreme donut, cut in half and grilled. Oh hell yeah. Can't you just feel your arteries hardening just by thinking of eating that thing? Oh, and a traditional Luther Burger doesn't come with any veggies at all. No pickles, onions, lettuce, or tomato. That would make it somewhat healthy.
Why is it called a Luther Burger? Well, it has nothing to do with it's Protestant roots. (Although it certainly isn't a Catholic Burger either, more commonly known as the Filet-O-Fish). Actually, word on the street is that it was a favorite of Luther Vandross, and he ordered them all the time, kinda like how Elvis liked to have grilled peanut butter and banana sandwiches.
Myself, I've never had a Luther Burger, and I don't even know where I could get one out here in Vegas, unless I make one on my own. But the truth is, it's not very high on my must-do list. I've had bacon cheeseburgers. I've had Krispy Kreme donuts. I don't need to combine them. It would be kinda like putting a scoop of moose tracks on top of my pepperoni and mushroom pizza. Some things might be better just left alone.
But you never know unless you try. I thought strawberries marinated in balsamic vinegar would taste worse than liver dipped in buttermilk, but hey, it's actually pretty damn good.
Oh well. I still have nothing to write about. The suggestion box is open.
Mikey
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