A Tradition Like No Other...

Yep, the first major sporting event since the Super Bowl kicks off today, The Masters. (Oh wait, I almost forgot about the hillbillies drivin' around in circles down in Daytona. My bad! And baseball, with it's three different opening days doesn't count as a major event, either). But The Masters is my favorite golf tournament to watch, regardless of Jim Nance sounding like he's delivering a four-day long eulogy, and it gets me paying attention to the PGA tour for the rest of the summer.

I'm rooting for Lefty (ASU!), Jose Maria Olazabal, Fred Couples, and Fuzzy, of course. Oh, and I'm firmly rooted in the Anybody But Tiger camp, too. I think I'm growing weary of him, his over-reacting to photographs (brothaman ain't playin' golf in a vacuum), and his banana-in-the-tailpipe voice. He just seems like he's overdue for a good beat-down. Oh, and if Rocco Mediate was in the field, I'd be rooting for him too, but he's having a tough year and didn't qualify.

My plan for the day is to get this last post up, turn off the lamp on the nightstand, and get a few hours of sleep before catching the afternoon coverage on ESPN. I'll be munchin' on my own pimento and cheese Masters sandwich, and watching golf right up until heading back to work later tonight, kicking off a brand new workweek. Yay.

So, Go Phil! And Fred! And here's to hoping that Tiger spends most of his afternoon wading around in Ray's creek looking for his ball. I hope he goes Tin Cup on the back nine and misses the cut, just so we won't have to listen to those preening schmoes on ESPN and CBS sing his praises all weekend. Because you know if he wins this thing, all we're gonna hear about all summer long, until he loses one, is "Can he get the Grand Slam???"

Seriously, I'm almost to the point where it wouldn't bother me if somebody went Tonya Harding on him right there at the practice range and he went down in a heap, crying Why...Why? Not that I'm advocating violence against anyone, but I'd rather see it happen to a smug bastard that never loses instead of a hot chick in tights. I'm just sayin'...

Mikey