Best. Chicken Salad. Evar.

I'm sitting here happily rubbing my tummy after having eaten what may have been the finest chicken salad sandwich I've ever had. Yes, it was that good.

And I was looking forward to it all night, having not eaten anything at work except a banana during my entire shift. So when I got home, I was good and hungry, and after I took my shower and such, I went to work in the kitchen putting together this world-class culinary delight.

First of all, yesterday morning, I put four large chicken breasts in the crockpot, seasoning them with salt, pepper, and garlic, and then drizzled them with some extra-virgin olive oil. I also added a generous pinch of chopped chives and parsley. Then came the secret ingredient--a teaspoon of bacon drippings! I added about a quarter cup of water to the pot and turned the whole thing on 'low' and let it percolate for six hours.

Once it cooled, it was beyond fork-tender. I seriously had to use a slotted spoon to get the chicken out of the crock and into a mixing bowl. It took me no time at all to shred it up with just a single dinner fork, and once that was done, I sealed the bowl and put it in the fridge.

Off to bed I went, then I spent the evening in the casino...

When I got home around 3:30 or so, I rough-chopped about a half a cup of cashew halves, and drained about two-thirds of a cup of pineapple tidbits. I added both of those ingredients to the chicken, along with several generous dollops of Miracle Whip, and finished the whole thing off with kosher salt and cracked pepper.

I folded it all together, spooned a hefty portion onto some soft wheat bread, poured myself an icy cold Diet Coke with Lime, and attacked that sandie like Homer Simpson hitting a box of donuts. Oh man, was it ever good! And the best part is that I made enough chicken salad to have sandwiches for the next several days. I've got some wheat sub rolls in the freezer, but I'm thinking a croissant might be even better. Oh well--gotta use the bread I have before it goes bad. Anyhow, if you get the urge to make chicken salad, I gotta tell ya, this recipe just kicks ass.

As far as my night in the casino goes... well, I'll write about that later. I'm in that 'Serenity Now' stage where I want to kick the ever livin' shit out of somebody, but instead, I'm taking the high road. The cool thing is, several other people want to kick the ever livin' shit out of this particular person, too, and they don't have nearly as long of a fuse as I do...

More later... Time to put my feet up and add a little rum to my diet Coke.

Mikey