They Call Me the Soul Crusher

Brothaman is a tuckered out little trooper this morning--I got absolutely worked last night. So right now I'm laying here flat on my stomach, stretching my legs and arching my feet, trying to fight of the charlie-horse that is doing it's damnedest to make an appearance. But more about that later--Let's start at the beginning.

After I made that post yesterday, I still didn't go straight to bed. I did a little more web surfing, posted a few odds and ends over at T2V, and then I got an email from Mamasan, so I knew she was up, and I decided to giver her a call since she'd left me a voice mail the day before.

We ended up talking for a half an hour or so (apparently there is another package on the way! Peanut Butter Balls--Woot!), before we wrapped it up and she headed out to lunch with a friend. I think I finally went to bed around 7:30, thinking I'd get up around noon, head down to the alterations shop (yes, more repairs to those trendy black polyester pants!), fill up the gas tank, and then go over to Albertson's and spend my $25 gift card they gave us at work. I'm leaning heavily towards purchasing a Hickory Farms Beefstick, some spicy mustard, a box of crackers, and a bottle of Captain Morgan--Merry Christmas to me!!!

Anyhow, those were the best-laid plans.

The next thing I knew, it was 4:15 in the afternoon. But I woke up very refreshed and relaxed, if not a little bummed about wasting the whole afternoon. But my back didn't hurt and I was ready to go. I guess the errands will have to wait another day.

But I killed an hour or so before heading to the casino, still wondering where I'd end up or what I'd be dealing. It turns out I was put back on the 'Keds' string--nothing but $5 shoes. Ugh. Oh well, it beat the hell out of getting sent to that Bonus Holdem flea game I hate so much. Between all the dealers, we've decided that the worst three tables to deal are Bonus Holdem, Let It Ride, and Mini Pai Gow. I swear if I had to deal all three of those games every night, it wouldn't be long before I grabbed the hunting rifle, packed a lunch, and climbed a tower... But the bosses seem to know it, and have split those games up, just to maintain our sanity. And on the plus side, it's been over a month since I got stuck on Let It Ride, so I guess I can't complain too much about that.

Anyhow, my first table was good and crowded with a fun group from Erie, PA--the home of the O-Needers! It turns out that they just weren't random touristas, but faithful lurkers readers of HurricaneMikey.com. And they were setting a fine example of how to tip the dealer, so of course I was rooting for them to win. But the jerkoff who stiffed me all night long was the only one winning, turning a $60 buy-in into something around $400. Anyhow, it was an enjoyable hour that went much too quickly. I hope they made some money, but they were gone by the time I got back three hours later.

My other two tables were up in the bar, which is good and bad. First of all, there is no player tracking up there, so I don't have to hassle with player cards or people begging for comps, players are only allowed to play one hand, and there are no pit bosses or floor people around. Basically, you're on your own, which is cool, because if I have a drunken asshole at the table, I can tell him to f*ck off. But most people that play up there are really cool. The problem is, I was just obliterating everyone who sat down. NOBODY colored up with any checks--I took EVERY dime from everyone who sat down. I was unbeatable. At one point, I got nine twenty-ones in a row! (Yes, the players were counting them down after the third one). It was just a bloodbath. So of course I ended up standing dead for almost two hours straight, and let me tell you, that just kills your feet and legs. It's like standing at military parade rest, but still, try it for forty minutes and you'll go nuts. At least I had a cocktail waitress or two to flirt with, but they were so bummed out because the bar was just dead last night. (No more live band--we got some lame DJ now).

But it was just a killer to stand there doing nothing--I'd much rather have a full table, just so the time passes. I had a tv right in front of me, but they were playing the NBA game, and I hate the NBA, and I especially hate the Lakers, so that was no help, either.

Luckily I got to go back to the main pit after 11 and deal a normal game, but I was still kicking everyone's ass, so the table would go dead, a few minutes would pass, and then some random person would walk up with 20 or 40 bucks, lose every hand, then walk away muttering obscenities, and the cycle would repeat for an hour. Not much fun. And that's pretty much how my night went. Too bad all my Stations stock got bought out and privatized, because I made the company some money last night.

I finally got tapped out at 2:20 and told I could take the half hour and go home, so I hobbled back to my locker, changed clothes, hit the timeclock, and said goodnight to all the chumps who had to stay behind.

Of course, once I got home, I was totally stiff from finally sitting down after about 8 hours of standing in one spot, so I looked like a retard trying to climb the steps to my front door. But another super-hot shower seems to have done the trick, and I feel much better. I was thinking that I'd go down to the jacuzzi again, but it's even colder now than it was the other night, and I didn't want my swim trunks to freeze on me during the walk back, so I gave that idea a pass.

My plan is to get to sleep a little earlier than I did yesterday so that I don't waste my entire day again. I've got to get to the alteration shop and gas up the truck today, otherwise I'll be out of gas on the side of the road wearing ghetto-fabulous black polyester pants with the ass ripped out of them. And if that happens, only the weirdos will stop to help me.

Mikey