Saturday, July 21, 2007

Just In Time For the Weekend

Well, myself, I had a couple of $30 Newcastles after work last night.

Yep. $30 apiece.

Normally they're only around five bucks each at your better establishments, but since the Jumbo Jackpot was sitting at $143,000 and steadily clocking upward to it's 150K limit, everyone I work with picked a machine and chased it for awhile once they punched out.

Well, I got my ass handed to me playing video poker--which I hate by the way, and I have no idea why I sat down there. But then my gal Denise found me and insisted that I join her in the realm of the truly desperate, and play some nickel Keno slots.

Oh man... I felt like a total loser. Seriously--Keno. Five cents per game. But Caveman Keno is nice and obnoxiously loud, thereby guaranteeing good cocktail service at 4:00 am. But how sad is it that we were trying to hit 7 out of 7 numbers on an 80-number board? For a whopping $300 payout? I mean, that's just completely ridiculous odds. Hell, I could drive down to Kingman, buy a Powerball ticket, only have to hit six out of six numbers and win $72 MILLION this week. Oh well, we were going for the Jumbo Jackpot, so that makes it totally worth it...

So there I was, sitting and pathetically feeding that machine a nickel at a time, hoping to score a little love from either The House or Denise. I got neither. That damn Jumbo Jackpot outlasted both of us, and I came home, alone...

But I'm not the only one who was chasing it. I know somebody else, who's initials are Falcon Rob, who spent his day off at Green Valley Ranch playing single-credit nickel video poker for hours on end. In fact I got the following text message around 10 pm when I was on my break:

I'm down five dollars and my eyes are starting to bleed. DAMN YOU JUMBO JACKPOT!


Do you have any idea how long it takes to be down five dollars on video poker when you're only playing a nickel at a time?

A long damn time.

Oh well, I hope somebody hits it before I go back to work tomorrow night. I'd hate to have to spend a hundred bucks for four beers.

That reminds me.--Did I ever tell you about the time I had the $600 Fatburger? It wasn't as tasty as you'd think...


Edited to add: I just spoke to Falcon Rob--he corrected me. He was playing PENNY video poker. Yep, one cent at a time. He didn't win the jackpot either, as evidenced by our lack of nice furniture...

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