Thursday, February 25, 2010

A Basket Full of Oh Hell Yeah

Howdy kiddies! I'm totally exhausted right now, but I just don't want to go to sleep right away. I'll go to bed in an hour or so because then I can sleep for six hours before having to get up and help AC move a truckload of stuff over to his new place.

Anyhow--I just got home from a very long and prosperous night at work. I was so busy that I had to stay an extra hour, too. That helps, because remember, I lost my Tuesday night shift completely. It was a great night of work, but I was locked down for five-and-a-half hours before another dealer came in to relieve me. I'll take that every day, but damn, I sure feel it when I finally stand up. Hell, I'm half-tempted to wander down to one of them Asian massage places and tell the chick No happy ending--I'll give you a hundred bucks just to walk on my back for an hour!

I'd probably just get in trouble for snoring though, so that idea shall remain in the hopper.

Anyhow... I had a great night, but it's good to be home.

Yesterday, I spent most of my free time working on that puzzle. I got so much done--All that's left is the sky and maybe about 15% of the water pieces. That's it--it's almost finished. But around 6:00 o'clock or so, while watching the Canadians beat the Russians like an angry pimp finding out his best girl is holding out on him, I was getting hungry.

I didn't have any meat thawed, I wasn't in the mood for breakfast food, didn't wanna go the canned or delivery route, and I didn't feel like having chicken salad, either. Wandering around in my kitchen, I saw a few onions, peppers, potatoes, and the like, but couldn't come up with anything. But then I remembered seeing a recipe from Bobby Flay about how he makes the perfect French Fries.

Now, longtime readers know that I'm not a 'fry' guy. I never order them. Only McD's has tolerable ones, but they get to cold unless you eat them in the car on the way home. Every other restaurant's fries just plain suck. And sit-down restaurants are especially bad at making French Fries. So I just stopped eating them a long time ago.

But I'd heard about those Bobby Flay fries and I wanted to try them out. I have a deep fryer, so I can eat them piping hot, just like god intended.

Anyhow, instead of just chopping up a bunch of potatoes and frying them in hot oil, like 99.999% of the population does, Chef Bobby says to cut the fries into quarter-inch slices, soak them in cold water for at least an hour (and up to eight), dry them off, and then cook them for a few minutes in 325-degree oil for about three or four minutes, stirring them constantly.

Then, once they are 'pale, blond, and limp', take them out of the oil and dry them on paper towels for a few minutes. While they are drying, crank the oil up to 375 degrees, and then return the fries to the hot oil for another four minutes or so, again, stirring them around a bit about once a minute.

Oh holy shiat--they turned out amazing. Crispy on the outside, on the inside just completely melted in your mouth. Sprinkled with a little bit of Kosher salt, they were the Best French Fries Ever. I am not kidding--they were that good. I've heard Anthony Bourdain talking about how double-fried fries were the only way to go, but I wasn't exactly sure what he meant at the time. Now I know. I've still got two potatoes left, so I'll probably make another batch tonight.

And no, I didn't take any pictures--once they came out of the fryer, I didn't waste any time letting them get cold. All I can say is 'trust me on this'. Next time you make home-made French Fries, do it this way. You won't be disappointed.

I'm out!


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